Conference! Wow, that was amazing. :)
To think that just a week and a half earlier I couldn't even run 5min. Jesus, You're amazing.
Conference was soo good for me - it was such a positive experience. I am still very overwhelmed by everyone's support and love shown at the race, and the incredible gift it was. You have all been such troopers coming alongside me this season, praying and encouraging me. Thank you so much! Here's my Conference story: (sorry it’s so long!)
All leading up to Conference I was very anxious and concerned about a) would I be able to run? b) how in shape am I to run? and c) will I be able to walk afterwards? I was getting very tired of constantly having to xtrain and not being able to run with you all. I just wanted to run, to run with the team! I wanted to practice with you guys, to run in costumes around Greenlake, to do the Buns Run... It was at the point where I didn't even want to run Conference if it was going to make me take another couple weeks off. But I also knew that not running was not going to be an option. God had given me an assurance that I would be running at the Conference course in Yakima, and He gave me this Scripture:
"For we would not, brethren, have you ignorant of our trouble which came to us in Asia, that we were pressed out of measure, above strength, insomuch that we despaired even of life. Indeed, in our hearts we felt the sentence of death, but this happened that we might not rely on ourselves but on God, which raiseth the dead. He delivered us from so great a peril, and doth deliver: and we trust that He will yet deliver us: Ye also helping together by prayer for us, that for the gift bestowed upon us by the means of many persons thanks may be given by may on our behalf." ~II Cor. 1:8-11
I also knew that I had to honor all your prayers and faith, and give God the chance to work a miracle.
When it became clear that I would be running at Conference, I was excited but mostly anxious. My foot was not 100% nor was I in perfect shape as I quickly found out trying to do 1k's with Kate and Lisa. Thursday's practice was a big boost, as I was able to complete the workout and accepted a slower pace. But it was all flat, and Conference would have hills, which were significantly harder for my foot. So I was still very uncertain as to how things would go.
The night before the race, I was still feeling very uncertain and discouraged. My legs felt terrible warming up on the course that afternoon, and I had no idea how to pace or mentally approach the race. I talked with Erika briefly that night and she said to treat this race as a special gift from God and just be glad to be out there - no matter what happens. That was the best possible thing she could've told me and it snapped me back into place. How could I have forgotten to be thankful?? This race truly was a gift from God and an amazing answer to prayer! Just last week I had been begging God to simply heal my foot in time to run Conference in honor of my teammates' steadfast prayers and faith. And here I was at the Conference meet getting ready to run! And yet all I could think about was how unprepared I was. I was focusing on how far I had to go rather than on how far God had brought me. I immediately went back to my room, knelt down and asked God's forgiveness for my selfish attitude, and purposed to run this race in thanksgiving to Him for all He had done in the last year of my life, and for my teammates because I loved them, and it was a team race.
The Conference race itself was A-mazing. I got adequately warmed up with healthy nerves and no pain. :) There was quite the ordeal at the start because the crazy timer clock wasn't working right, so we hopped around for lots of minutes before finally being told to get our sweats back on. Then, just as we were about to receive our clothes (they had already been taken back to the vans), it was sweats off again! oh well, we had a good team huddle/Indian(?) dance time. :)
As we were getting back on the starting line, Jessica told us to picture that guy, whose name I cannot remember (from
Endurance), and how he ran - beautiful. Running is beautiful. That stuck with me throughout the race and encouraged me along through some of the tougher portions - "Running is beautiful. This is beautiful and pleasing to God. I am running for Him and for my team."
After the long wait and a false start, we finally started the race. I went out and made sure I stayed behind Kate and Lisa and let them go. I still felt very uncertain and didn't know where I was/where I should be/my pace but tried to relax and remind myself that running is beautiful and I was running for God and my team in thanksgiving. Shortly thereafter, a Western girl came up beside me and started to pass me. Then another, and another. There was a solid pack of them (about 5 or so), and I realized that this was my group, this was my pack with which to run. So I went with them.
It was absolutely perfect. They ran probably the perfect pace for me gave me something specific to focus on through the race. I stuck with them and they pulled me up through the race, working to pass several runners. I stuck with them until we got to the big hill, where they really slowed down. I didn't exactly want to pass them because I knew I wasn't strong enough to hold my own against them and it would break me mentally, but I also didn't want to break my stride to stay with them. So I decided to continue up the hill, do a miniature crest for practice, then ease up on the downhill to let them catch back up. It worked wonderfully. Two of the girls caught back up with me and I followed them on down. This was where their pack broke up. :)
Coming along the straight from the start, I caught my mind drifting to my foot for a check-in where my mind & body wanted to let-up and pre-celebrate that I would be finishing the race. But by God's grace I was promptly reminded that my goals were higher than that - I was running for God and for the team, and it is beautiful, when done from the heart. I kicked my mind back in gear and noticed that I was falling back with the 2nd girl while the other Western was starting to pull away. So with renewed purpose, I went with the front Western girl (their #3, Emily).
I continued to follow Emily around the course, again until the hill. This time I tried to make my move there as I knew she wasn't as strong on the hill. I did beat her on the hill and tried to surge on the downhill, but I wasn't able to hold it and she caught me near the bottom. I would not let her go however, and kept her within striking distance. Along the parking area, Doris told me to pass two. I groaned. (there was another girl we had caught up with) I had a hard time judging finishing distance and strength, but with that new goal in mind, I somehow managed to pass both, the other just before the line.
Yay! I was so filled with thanks and gratitude when I was done! I had a hard time grasping what God had just done - healed my foot in time to race Conference, gave me some good wake-up calls at practice, fixed my attitude, gave me people to run with and helped me stay strong mentally! And my foot didn't even hurt! I felt so incredibly blessed and unworthy of it all! And Lisa and Jessica, the whole team, sincerely rejoiced and celebrated with me. Even though the team did not do as well as we would've liked, you all still joyfully came alongside and selflessly rejoiced. Then Jessica gave us an encouraging team debrief, and we prayed together. It was beautiful.
So that was my Conference race! I am still filled with thankfulness to God and each of you for the roles you have played in my life! I would not have been able to do any of this without you! It's because of all of you that I even came back to SPU to try to run one more season. And you prayed and encouraged and kept my hopes up through the thick and thin of this season as well. You are each a very special blessing from God! I appreciate you all so much! I know we didn't do as well as a team as we had hoped, but every race when run your best for God is a success. And I believe you all are over-achievers! =)
So thank you so much for the ways you have so richly blessed my life in the last two years! (or four for you seniors! and even the last couple months of knowing you freshies! ;) You each have been very inspiring and wonderful teammates and friends. I pray that God richly blesses the rest of your time at SPU and that you can rejoice in His work! Cherish it!
I love each of you!
~Suzie